Where are they now?
by Luvlee Kitsune Forever
Summary: Chris and Chef stalk all the former campers ten years later. Many surprises, and many, not so surprising things happen.
1. Idea Time

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Me: Hey. Nezumi (mouse) Here. ok. Most of you know about the series TOTAL DRAMA ISLAND. Well, it is HUGE in america/Connecticut. so. I decided to create a spoof on it that happens TEN YEARS LATER. it is hilarious. You've gotta love it.

Ryuu: Luv wat?

Me:Weren't you listening?

Ryuu: I never listen! -smiles hugely-

Me: True. True.

Sakura (koneko): Sooo....u made a TDI spoof huh? am i in it?

Me: Maybe....

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Total Drama Island Whatsoever. Don't own. Don't sue.

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Chris: Welcome back to Wawanakwa Island where are campers are....well....where _are_ our campers?

Chef: I dunno. Should I go hunt them? (takes out ginat net and rifle)

Chris: Now, chef, what have i told you about that? We don't hunt the campers, we just do whatever it takes to hurt, destroy, embarrass, or annoy them.

Chef: (groans and puts away hunting gear)

Chris: Okay...so our campers aren't here...OH. GREAT IDEA!!!

Chef: Oh god. (goes into camper and locks all doors and windows)

Chris: Okay. We are gonna do a "Where are they now" sort of thing. We will stalk each one and find out where they are now so you can see. Now, this is ten years later, soo....they could be dieing for all I know, but-

Chef: Uh, Chris? They're only 26 now. They aren't dieing.

Chris: Fine. Rain on my parade why don't you. So. Lets sta-

Postman: Package for Mr. Chris...whatshisname.

Chris: Thats me! What is it?

Postman: Sign here Please.

Chris: WHAT IS IT??? (whines)

Postman: If I knew I would tell you. Now sign here.]

Chris: FINE. (signs clipboard)

Postman:(hands over huge box about the size of the mail truck)

Chris: CHEF. GET THE CHAINSAW!!! I HAVE A GIANT BOX!!

Chef: Ha Ha Ha. (opens box with chainsaw)

Chris: What is it?

Chef: You got me.

Izzy: BOO!!

Chris: AHHHH (jumps into chef's arms)

Chef: Bah. (drops Chris)

Chris: OW. Izzy? What are you doing here?

Izzy: Well I just got out of...of...of...FISH. (points towards a tree and runs)

Chris: Okay....Well, lets get started with the stalking!!

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**Me: Ok. So it wasn't the LONGEST chapter ever. But it gives you an idea of what comes next...i promise you the next chappy will be much better. PLEASE REVIEW. NO FLAMES. Oh. and if you have any ideas for where Ezekial and Noah should be, tell me. I need help with them....**


	2. Lindsay

**Me: Hey. I'm back with the next chapter. **

**Rachel (who will be known as Ongaku from this point on): WOOT. Am I courtney?**

**Me: No. No one plays characters. They are all themselves. it's a Where are they now spoof with TDI.**

**Ongaku: Awwww....**

**Disclaimer: Don't own. Don't sue.**

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Chris: Hello and welcome to New York, New York where we will be stalking Lindsay. Lets watch.

Lindsay: Hello and welcome to the Today Show. I'm your host, Lindsay. Today we will wel- OH HEY CHRIS!! (spots chris hiding behind the couch)

Chris: Heh Heh Heh. Uhm....Hey Lindsay...We weren't stalking you or anything if that's what you think...

Chef: Hey...

Lindsay: Ok. So, today we will welcome my former camp counseler CHRIS and the cook there, CHEF.

Audiance: YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY (going wild)

Chris: Heh Heh. Hi everyone.

Lindsay: So, Chris, wyh don't you tell everyone what you're doing behind my couch with a camera crew.

Chris: Well, I'd rather not s-

Lindsay: (giving chris a freaky smile look)

Chris: Ok Ok. We are doing a where are they now thing for TOTAL DRAMA ISLAND. We stalk or Spy on the former campers from ten years ago to see what they are doing now.

Lindsay: SO YOU ARE STALKING ME!!! You are dissapointed aren't you?

Chris: Huh?

Lindsay: You were porbably hoping that I was a model or a stupid actress or something instead of the smart Today Show host.

Chris: Well, I wouldn't sa-

Lindsay: Ya know Chris, This is all because of you.

Chef: What?

Lindsay: Yah. Because everyone treated me so rudely and told me I was ignorant, I decided to try harder in school. I began to get straight A's and went to Princeton for College. I am now the Today Show host.

Chef: So, you're thanking him?

Lindsay: No. I am just saying this is all his fault if he is dissapointed.

Chef: Ohhhhhhhh.....

Chris: So, Lindsay, in about 22 weeks, would you like to come back to camp Wawanakwa and reunite with your former Killer Bass and Screaming Gopher friends?

Lindsay: Why should I?

Chris: You'll get to see Tyler?

Lindsay: Maybe I see all my 21 friends everyday.

Chris: Do you?

Lindsay: Well, no.

Chris: So you'll come bacK?

Lindsay: What's in it for me?

Chris: You have the chance to win $1,000 dollars.

Lindsay: What's the catch?

Chris: No catch...(looks around anxiously)

Lindsay: Chris???

Chris: FINE. You'll be put on a brand new team with a different group of people, i mean, they will still be the same people from ten years ago, but you will be mixed with new people.

Lindsay: Will it still be called the Killer Bass and the Screaming Gophers?

Chris: No

Lindsay: What will they be called?

Producer: LINDSAY. We're off the air in 60 seconds.

Lindsay: Well, folks, that's all the time we have for today, so see ya tomorrow on the TODAY SHOW.

OFF SET-

Lindsay: So, what will the teams be called?

Chef: Uhm...well....

Chris: They will be called the Pouncing Panthers and the Brutal Bears.

Lindsay: FINE. But, make sure Gwen is with Trent, Bridgette and Geoff are together, And Heather is stuck with Owen.

Chris: Done, Done, and DEFINITELY done.

Lindsay: Thank you. Well, I better be on my way. SEE YA IN 22 WEEKS!!!

Chef: Buh-Bye.

Chris: See ya.

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Me: Ok, so, it wasn't the longest, but hey, this will be the longest story I've ever written and I won't abandon it this time. I PROMISE. Ok, well, next chapter, Chris will be stalking the devil herself, Heather. Joy...well, I could make her poisoned or dead or MARIED TO EZEKIAL. Mhuahahahahahahahaha. So many evil possibilities. Send me ideas for the rest of the characters. I NEED FEEDBACK. I don't mind if you send flames now. It is good criticism. So review please. SEE YA.


	3. Night Club

**Me: Hey. I'm back with the next chapter. And guess what. ITS ABOUT HEATHER. **

**Leshawna: Aftah wat that she-bitch did to gwen, i am gonna rip her head off uh her shoulders and-**

**Me: Leshawna. GOOD BYE. It's not your chapter yet!!!**

**Leshawna: Oh. See ya.**

**Me: Ok. Before I start my third chappy, i would like to thank all of you who have been giving me feedback and ideas about my story. I really appreciate it.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own. Don't sue.**

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**Chris: Today we are stalking the ever majestic Heather bird.**

**Chef: .........(slaps self in head)**

**Chris: Today we are in a L.A. night club where we find this majestic beauty lurking in the night...club....with her hubby.**

**Heather: (glugs down twentieth margarita) This song goes out to Cody!! Love ya baby!!**

**Cody: Uhmm...yah...she's drunk...but...uhm...uh...yyah....**

**Heather: (starts singing I WILL SURVIVE) I will survive. Hey Hey!!**

**Chris: Wow. Let's get a closer look. (starts inching toward the stage)**

**Heather: OH HEY CHRIS. Come to kiss my feet and apologize cuz u no i was sposed to win?**

**Chris: Nooo...I was just wondering what you do for a living.**

**Heather: THIS. (starts stripping down)**

**Chef: O. M. G.**

**Chris: (drooling)**

**Cody: I don't know her.**

**Gwen: Holy shit.**

**Chris: When did Gwen get here?**

**Cody: She lives here. She RUNS this night club.**

**Chris: Ohhh...**

**Gwen: Hey Chris. Come to ruin our lives again?**

**Chef: No. Oh gawd no. Not the one who was never afraid of me. SHIT dude. Why here? Why Now? Why HER???**

**Gwen: I'll pretend i didn't hear...wait. Did he just say something???**

**Chris: He does that a lot now.**

**Gwen: Great. So. Seriously. Why are you here. In my night club? With a camera crew. Staring at heather. who. is now....stripping???**

**Heather: Hey Gwendala.**

**Gwen: Dont ever call me that again.**

**Chris: Ok. So we are here. Because. We are doing a where are they now thing where we stalk the campers from ten years ago.**

**Chef: And in about 22 well 21 weeks. we want all of you to come back and be a part of the show again to try to win 1,000 dollars. again.**

**Heather: I WILL.**

**Cody: I guess I will. If my male modeling job slows a bit.**

**Chris: You are a male model?**

**Cody: Duh. After Gwen turned me down for the fifteenth time I decided to work out and make a living for myself. Eventually I got buff and grew taller and I decided to try to become a model. And it worked. Now I am super famous and super scheduled. But I will try to see if it fits into my schedule. (takes out day planner) Yah it works.**

**Chris: How bout you Gwen?**

**Gwen: Fine.**

**Chef: Where's Trent?**

**Gwen: Huh?**

**Chef: Trent. Where is he? Weren't you guys going out after the finale??**

**Gwen: Yah. He is on his music tour. He won't be back for another 20 weeks.**

**Chris: Can you get him to come?**

**Gwen: Yah. Now. Good bye. (snaps fingers)**

**A bunch of security people come and throw out chef, chris, and the camera crew.**

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**Me: Ok. Well. That surprised even me. Well. Review please. And I need some more ideas. Thanks. PEACE.**


	4. Noah's gay?

**Me: Hey. I'm back with the next chapter. And guess what. ITS ABOUT NOAH!!**

**Ongaku: Mhuahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaa**

**Me: Yes. You all remember Ongaku. (trying not to attack her)**

**Sakura: Heyy Ami!!**

**Me: MY NAME IS NEZUMI!!!**

**Ryuu: Heyyy Nezumi!!**

**Me: At least SHE gets it.**

**Sakura: You know we love you.**

**Me: I know. (hugs sakura) **

**Ryuu: Hey...Where's my hug? **

**Me: Come here. (hugs ryuu)**

**Ryuu: YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY**

**Me: Ok. Before Ongaku passes out of total disgust over girls hugging (cough) please pass out (cough) I think I should get on with bothering Noah.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own. Don't sue.**

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Chris: Do we haaaaavvvveeeee toooooooo????

Chef: Yes (dragging Chris to Noah's work)

Chris: But I HATE the doctor's office!!!

Chef: Too bad. We're here anyway.

Chris: Oh.....Wait...This isn't the Doctor's office. This is a psychiatrist's office. EVEN WORSE.

Noah: (wearing maid outfit) Hey Chris. (reading book as he talks) Why are you here?

Chris: Oh. Just came to.....search for....my medication.

Noah: Oh. Carry on.

Chris: You aren't even gonna ask what TYPE of medication?

Noah: No. I know what type of medication.

Chef: Dude. He doesn't take medication. He is supposed to. But he doesn't.

Noah: Oh. Well.. See ya.

Chris: WAIT! Can we ask you a few questions?

Noah: Sure. What?

Chris: Why are you wearing a maid's outfit?

Noah: Uhm...well...(drops book) ya see...

Chef: He's Gay.

Noah: How'd you know?

Chef: You kissed Cody's ear during the TDI season ten year's ago..

Noah: Oh....yeah....

Chris: So...you work as a maid? At a psychiatrist office. And you're gay?

Noah: Yup. Can I go now?

Chris: Who is your Boss?

Eva: I AM.

Chris: Mommy. (hide's behind Chef)

Eva: Ever since I was voted off a second time, I decided it was time to get myself in line. I'm not the same as I used to be, Chris. No one is.

Chris: What do you mean?

Eva: You pushed everyone off the edge. We are all different. I am not the bully I used to be. Gwen, is still goth, but isn't easily embarrassed anymore. Noah isn't afraid to show his gay side. Cody gave up on gwen and isn't a pipsqueek anymore. Heather is insecure and has to come to ME for advice. Izzy...well she will always be Izzy...Owen went on Biggest Loser and is now thin and a fitness instructor. Uhm...Katie and Sadie aren't inseperable anymore and they both work at entirely different jobs. Sadie works for a newspaper. She is the horoscoep person. And Katie is a pet groomer. As you know, Lindsay is no longer a dumb blonde. And Trent is now not afraid of mimes, engaged to Gwen, and he is a professional musician. Beth is now a school teacher and Harold is a karate instructor. Leshawna is a fashion designer and Courtney has finally admitted to likeing Duncan. Courtney is also a bar waitress. And Duncan is now a wood carver in an old AMISH village. HE'S AMISH. DJ is now a vetrinarian and Geoff is a professional surfer. Big surprise. Heh. Bridgette, though, OMIGOSH. Bridgette works on a farm and has 3 kids with another on the way. SHE IS AMISH TOO. Ezekial isn't a freak anymore, he is actually a director of a major tv show in CALIFORNIA. Justin and Tyler now work together as bodygaurds for Britney Spears and you...well..YOUR YOU. AND NOT FAMOUS. AND AN IDIOT.

Chef: True Dat.

Chris: HA HA HA HA HA

Noah: What the hell is so damn funny?

Chris: Did he just swear? Wow....No. But DUNCAN AND BRIDGETTE ARE AMISH???? And BRIDGETTE is PREGNANT??? Ha. This will be an awesome episode...

Eva: What do you mean?

Chris: Oh. Well..this is gonna be on TV as a Where are they now thing. And then everyone from ten years ago is going to come back on the show in...well it was gonna be in like 20 weeks..But now they can come in a week thanks to you!! YAY.

Eva:...Why should we come back on that torture show? And I mean how is Bridgette supposed to pass the sports challenges?? SHES PREGNANT!!!

Chris: Hmmmm.....Geoff Can carry her.

Noah: SHE'S PREGNANT

Chris: Trent can carry her.

Chef: She's pregnant

Chris: She can swim.

Chef, Eva, and Noah: SHE'S-

Chris: I know. I know. She's Pregnant. Gawd.

Me: That's right!

Noah: AHHH. Who are you?

Me: Nezumi. I am the one writing this story. Yeesh. It's not brain surgery.

Chris: THATS IT. SHE CAN HAVE SURGERY TO GET RID OF THE BABY.

Me: You mean have an abortion? Yeah don't think thatd work. She's like seven months into it.

Chris: Yeah? And? Your point?

Me: Once your past like two to three months you CAN NOT GET AN ABORTION.

Chris: I will do the surgery.

Eva: Hell no. You are dangerous just by holding a fork to your food. We are not letting you cut open our innocent lil' Bridge just so you can get good ratings.

Me: You just sounded like Leshawna.

Eva: Great....

Ongaku: Hey peeps.

Me: Where the hell did you come from? (signs in sign language you are a beautiful emo)

Ongaku: Your mom. (signs do i look emo to you)

Me: I thought you hated those mom jokes. (signs well...no. But. fine. you are not a beutiful emo. you are a beautiful danger)

Ongaku: I do. I just got bored. (signs thank you. you are a beautiful palm tree)

Me: WOOT.

Chris: What are they saying? Are they aliens?

Chef: (slaps self then chris in head. Chris goes flying)

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Me: Okay then...i guess the campers will soon be recieving surprises of their own when they find out what their friends are up to. BRIDGETTE. and how much time they have to get prepared for another frightening stay at camp Wawanakwa.

Ongaku: SEE YA.


	5. Campers arrive

**Me: Hey. I'm back with the next chapter. **

**Ryuu: YAYYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY.**

**Me: Wat in the world is up with you?**

**Ryuu: Remember what i did yesterday in front of Mr. Lynch?**

**Me: Oh yeah...**

**Sakura: That was awkward....**

**Ongaku: What'd she do?**

**Me: She Yelled "I'm Pregnant" in front of Mr. Lynch and he looked freaked out.**

**Ryuu: It was funny.**

**Me: No it wasn't**

**Sakura: It really wasn't yet it was.**

**Me: True.**

**Ongaku: Huh? **

**Chris: Can we start the actual CHAPTER??**

**Me: Later.**

**Chef: Omg. Ryuu yelled shes pregnant in front of your HEALTH TEACHER???**

**Me: Yes...OMG. Did chef just talk?**

**Ongaku: Freeeaaaaakyyyy.**

**Me: I guess we should hurry up on the chappy thing.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own. Don't sue. Only my odd ideas.**

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**Chris: Hello and welcome to Total. Drama. Island. Today we will be welcomign back our campers from ten years ago. Each is now 26 years old and have very odd lifestyles now....Ha Ha. Mine is awesome.**

**Duncan walks up behind Chris and slaps him in the face.**

**Chris: What was that for?**

**Duncan: For ruining my life. **

**Chef: (laughing his butt off on the floor)**

**Duncan: Ok. BBQ meatballs anyone?**

**Everyone runs up and grabs a meatball off the platter.**

**Courtney: Mmmmmmm. Sooo good.**

**Bridgette: I have been craving these for ever. You HAVE to give me the recipe. **

**Duncan: Sure will. **

**Gwen: Aww. Bridgette. When did you concieve?**

**Bridgette: Seven months ago.....Why?**

**Gwen: Wait..so your due in two months?**

**Bridgette: Yeah. Why?**

**Gwen: Well the season isn't over for another four months. So what happens if you make it mid way and then you go into labor?**

**Bridgette: I hold i-**

**Chris: Ok ok. Pow wow over. Girl's cabin is over there (points to a giant pink mansion)**

**Heather: Woah. When did you go from overstuffed cabins to gorgeous mansions?**

**Chris: Yesterday. And guys cabins are over there. (points to a huge blue mansion)**

**Trent: Awww sweet dude...But what if your married? Or engaged? and want to be with your wife/husband?**

**Chris: TOO BAD.**

**Geoff: He's just sour cause he doesn't have a girlfriend. Come on guys. let's go get unpacked.**

**Chef: You are such a loser.**

**Chris: I am not.**

**Chef: Yes. You. Are.**

**Chris: Whatever.**

**Me: Where should we go?**

**Chris: Who are you?**

**Me: We are the girls who crashed your last episode.**

**Chris: Oh. You can have that cabin. (points to a red mansion twice the size of the girl's.)**

**Ongaku: SWEET!! (starts to run toward the cabin, but i grab her hood.)**

**Me: What's the catch?**

**Ryuu: Yeah. What's the catch?**

**Chris: There's no catch.**

**Sakura: (goes up and lifts chris by the shirt) What. is. the. catch?**

**Chris: Ok. Ok. I just want you guys to be in the competition too. And Nezumi?**

**Me: Yes?**

**Chris: Would you want to be a judge/nurse/chef/motivator/friend?**

**me: Yes. I will. Wait, hang on. What will chef do?**

**Chris: Oh. he is gonna be on vacation for a while. So.**

**Me: I will do what i can to help. But just no, i will make friends with all of the competitors.**

**Chris: Go ahead.**

**me: YAY. Have fun guys with the competition. I will be cooking up some dinner for ya all. **

**Ryuu: What are we having?**

**Sakura: Can it be japanese?**

**Me: Sure. How about onigirii, chicken lo mein, and orange chicken?**

**Ongaku: What about pizza?**

**Me: Ok. I will make a desert pizza too. How about chocolate sauce with ice cream topping with cherries and whipped cream and sprinkles?**

**All: Perfect! See ya later.**

**I head over to the kitchen while my friends head to the cabin. It is now time for dinner.**

**Tyler: OMIGOSH. Who made this? It is the best food camp wawanakwa has ever had. **

**Justin: I know. It is soo perfect. It's better than me.**

**I roll my eyes.**

**Courtney: I can't believe chef hatchet made it.**

**Ryuu: Oh but he didn't.**

**Izzy: Then who did?**

**Me: I did. Introduceing your new judge/chef/nurse/motivator/friend. **

**Owen: Woah. Hah-tea.**

**Izzy slaps owen in the face.**

**Me: I will be all over so just call my cell. My number is posted on all of the refridgerators of your house so. Just call if you ever need a nurse, chef, judge, motivator, or just someone to talk to. I'll be here. **

**Sakura: Finally. Someone we can actually count on. **

**Me: Yup. **

**Cody: Thanks Nezumi!**

**Me: You don't have to call me nezumi. That is just a nickname i gave myself. My real name is-**

**Speakers: Attention campers. The first competition is about to begin. Please meet me at the stage where the talent show held place last season. **

**Me: Well. I guess you guys better going.**

**Trent: Wait. But what's your real name? **

**Me: You'll find out soon enough.**

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**Me: Ha Ha. mysterious ending. CLIFF HANGER. **

**Ryuu: Can't you jsut tell them your name b-**

**me: SHUT UP. You nearly gave my name away!!**

**Sakura: I will tape up her big fat mouth.**

**Me: Thank you.**

**Please review!!**


	6. Bridgette?

**Me: Hey. I'm back with the next chapter. **

**Ryuu: You get to learn her real name!**

**Sakura: Yups.**

**Ongaku: Yerp.**

**Me: Ok. So. I have given some of my friends the wrong personalities so i will tell you about all of my friends the RIGHT way before starting the chapter.**

**ME AND MY FRIENDS:**

**Me-Hair:Blonde, shoulder length, curly. Eyes:Blue or green depending on the light. Height: 4'10" Outfit: frilly black mini skirt with goth hello kitty t-shirt that says "music is my life" and black high heel knee high boots. Accessories: Black kitty collar, vintage music, drawing book. Type: Girly/Artsy**

**Ryuu-Hair:Blonde with hints of purple streaks. A bit longer than shoulder length. Curly. Eyes:Blue-green Height: Unknown Outfit: Dark wash jeans with white t-shirt and black corsette. Black 5 inch heel knee length boots with buckles. Accessories: Black lace kitty collar and grimjow doll. Type: Artsy/Rocker**

**Sakura-Hair: orangy/brunette shoulder length. excessively curly. Eyes: Brown Height: Unknown** **Outfit: Light wash jeans with twilight t-shirt and sneakers Accessories: korean necklace, large bag with drawing stuff in it, and ichigo doll. Type: Artsy/Rocker/Videogame guru**

**Ongaku-Hair:Straight, black, short Eyes: Unknown Height: Unknown Outfit: Dark jeans with blue tanktop and black and blue striped hooded sweatshirt, sneakers. Accessories: glasses, sheet music Type: Musical/x-cutter/tom-boy**

**Ongaku: Yup. thats me.**

**Me: Did i mention that ongaku is a huge fan of Frank Iero.**

**Sakura: Nope. Ha Ha. I CANT BELIEVE YOU DIDN'T RECOGNIZE ME ON THE PHONE THIS MORNING!!!**

**Me: You two (ryuu and sakura) Were talking at the same time. I couldn't figure out who either of u were.**

**Ryuu: Ha Ha. I like ur butt.**

**Me: Uhm...(sits down in chair)**

**Ryuu: Awwwww**

**Me: Ha Ha**

**Ongaku: ...Can i kill creeper now?**

**Me: Yess. OH JASON. (he is freakishly tall with a braided afro and wickedly annoying)**

**Jason: Yeah? OMG. RACHEL. Wil you love me?**

**Ongaku: No. Just so you know, i am getting my hunting liscence and i have a gun. and (takes out gun) BOOM.**

**Jason: AHHHHH. X.X**

**Ongaku: I am going to slap him a while. (starts slappign his dead face) Ha Ha. This is fun.**

**Me: Uhm...Maybe we should start the actual chappy.**

**Sakura: Yeah.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own. Don't sue. Just my retarded ideas.**

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Chris: Hello and welcome back to Total. Drama. Island. Today the campers will be competing in their first competition, but first they must learn whether they r on team punsing panthers or if they're on team burtal bears.

Me: Hey Chris. Considering this challenged is based aroudn me, do u mind if I tell the campers about it?

Chris: Not at all.

Me: Thanks. Ok campers. Today's challenge is a boys vs. girls contest. This contest is called "The Name Game." This game is to help you find out what my real name is. There are clues hidden around the camp site. You will know them when you see them. You must put the clues you find into these bags. The pink bag is for the girls or the Pouncing panthers and the blue bag is for the boys or the brutal bears. Ok. The first team to come back here with the clues and tell me my real name, wins. The prize is a new iphone for every member of the winning team. Ok? START!

The teams are off.

Girls Team:

Gwen: Oh. Is that a clue? (points to a golden retriever sitting with a stuffed bunny)

Ryuu: YEAH. THATS HER DOG. Nyla! Come here girl.

Nyla runs over with a bunny and a note tied to the bunny.

Ongaku: Hey Look. A note. That is probably a clue.

Sakura: No duh genius.

Ongaku: (glares)

Lindsay removes the note and reads it allowed.

Lindsay: You have found a clue. One of the letters in my name is a "B" just like the bunny my dog is holding. Your doing great. Now keep on going.

Sakura: Come on Ny. we're gonna go find your owner's name.

Guys Team:

Trent: O my gosh. Could this be any harder?

Duncan: We just have to keep our eyes opened. (sniffs the air) hey. Do you smell fire?

DJ: Yeah man. We should go check it out.

They come to a large bonfire with a man and a woman standing near it. They are wrapped in a warm blanket and holding a small piece of paper. They start waving the boys over.

Woman: hello. I am Jean. I am your judge's grandmother. And this is my husband, Lowell. here is the first clue to your contest.

Justin: "You have met my grandparents, Jean and Lowell. The first letter of my name is a "B". Now continue on and fine the others"

Ezekial: Eh? Okay. See ya latah.

Back with Chris and me

Me: So How many clues do you think they have found so far?

Chris: Probably only one each.

Me: Ha Ha. Probably. Ya know. The girls will probably win. They have my friends on their team who already know my name. They just have to find the clues.

Chris: Oh well.

me: Ha Ha. Well. Better keep hiding clues.

I go out and hide the rest of the clues.

After about an hour of looking for clues the guys run back and report that not only did they find all the clues, but they also found the girls huddled around something worried.

Me: Ok. Tell me my name and then we will run to the girls.

Noah: Your name is Brianna.

me: Yes. You guys get the IPhones. Now where are the girls?

Cody: Over by the lake. COME ON!

We all rush to the lake to find the girls huddled around something with majorly frightened looks on their faces.

Me: Is everyone ok?

No one answers me.

Me: I said, Is everyone ok?

Again, no reply. I count the heads of all the huddled girls. Only 13. one girl is missing. I list the names in my head making sure everyone is there.

Me: Let's see there's Eva, Izzy, Heather, Gwen, beth, lindsay, leshawna, katie, sadie, courtney, ongaku, ryuu, sakura....bridg-Wait. Where's bridgette?

I push everyone out of the way to see bridgette passed out on the beach. i gently wake her up and she screams.

Me: What happened?

bridgette: AHHHHHHHHHH

Geoff runs in to see what is the matter with his wife.

Geoff: What is it bridge?

Bridgette: You did this to me.

Me: Huh?

Courtney: I think she is saying that she is going into labor.

Me; Two months EARLY???

Courtney: Yeah. Brianna.

me: What did you just say?

Courtney: Brianna. That's your name isn't it?

Me: Yeah.

Ongaku: We have to get bridgette to a hospital.

Me: I know that. (i call 911 on my cell) Yeah. Bridgette is going into labor near the lake at camp wawanakwa. Get here asap.

The ambulance boat thing arrives in five minutes and rushes bridgette and geoff off to the hospital. But they are not sure that she or the baby will make it...

* * *

Me: Please review and reply.


	7. Whats wrong?

**

* * *

**

Me: ok. so the last chappy was a tad odd. But hey, now you know my REAL name. And now i will start calling my friends by THEIR real names too. Here is a list of all of my friends.

**Kailee (sakura)**

**Anna (Ryuu)**

**Rachel (Ongaku)**

**Meglin**

**Bailey**

**Jamie**

**V.V.**

**Renee**

**Mary Alison**

**and many many more.**

**Rachel: Yo.**

**me: What up?**

**Rachel: Nuttin. Scared.**

**Me: Uhm...Lets talk bout it later k?**

**Rachel: Fine. I'll have paige yell at you.**

**Me: Wat evs.**

**Kailee: YAY. My real name is back!**

**Anna: Awww...i liked being called Ryuu. **

**Me: Too bad. I like anna better. Cause then I can annoy you by calling you Annabella.**

**Anna: (glares at me)**

**Me: Go fuck Grimjow. (character from Bleach)**

**Anna: OK. **

**Sakura: Uhm...**

**Disclaimer: Don't own. Don't sue. Only my retarded ideas.**

* * *

**The boat arrived early the next morning around noon.**

**Me: Geoff! What's wrong?**

**I am awaiting Geoff's arrival when I see him crying.**

**Geoff: I (sniff) and her (sniff) and him (sniff) WAAAAHHHH**

**Me: Did you get a word of that other than i and her and him wahh?**

**Beth: No. I didn't. Calm down Geoff and tell us what happened. Is the baby okay?**

**Geoff: Yes.**

**Trent: Is Bridgette okay?**

**Geoff: Yes.**

**DJ: So if their both ok, what's the problem?**

**Geoff: (begins crying again)**

**Me: Come on geoff. I think you and I need to talk alone and see whats bothering you.**

**Geoff and I start walking away with Trent and DJ following us.**

**Me: I said ALONE. **

**Trent walks toward the pink mansion to find gwen and DJ goes to find Bunny.**

**Geoff and I go to the top floor of the red mansion i am staying at and lock the door to the balcony.**

**Me: Now whats bothering you. **

**Geoff: I'd rather not say.**

**Me: Now come on. I am your friend. I swear I won't tell anyone. **

**Geoff: (crying more now)**

**Me: Geoff. If Bridgette and the baby are ok, then whats the matter?**

**Geoff: I'm scared.**

**Me: About what?**

**Geoff: About being a father. This is my first chi-**

**Me: Wait. Hang on. I thought you already had like seven kids.**

**Geoff: No. Those are Duncan's. When he gets busy, he gets REAL busy.**

**Me:...Awkward.**

**Geoff: But I am afraid that I won't be a good father.**

**Me: You will be a great father. And Bridgette has already had seven kids right? So if you ever need help, ask her. Ha Ha**

**Geoff: (looks at me like its not funny then bursts out laughing) Yeah. Your right Brianna. There's nothing to worry about. Thanks. **

**Me: No problem. Ya know. It's kinda wierd being 14 and giving a 26 year old life long advice...**

**Geoff: Eh. You'll get used to it Kiddo. **

**Me: Hey. Who you callin' kiddo? You didn't get on this show as a contestant until you were 16! I am only 14 and i am the judge/nurse/chef/motivator/friend.**

**Geoff: Yeah Yeah Yeah. Hey. Wanna go surfing later?**

**Me: On a lake?**

**Geoff: Sure. Why not?**

**Me: Well. I don't know how...**

**Geoff: I'll teach ya. **

**Me: Well. I kinda gotta make dinner later.**

**Geoff: Can't your friends do it?**

**Me: I guess but...Ya know. One of em is helping Gwen with wedding plans, another is helping Chris with challenge ideas. it's kinda tight.**

**Geoff: Then order out. How about taco bell?**

**Me: Well...Okay. It'll be fun.**

**Back at the mess hall.**

**Courtney: Where's Bri and Geoff?**

**Beth: They had to talk about something.**

**Anna: Wasn't that like two hours ago? I mean I'm hungry. I want dinner.**

**Kailee: You guys do not want to see her when she's hungry.**

**Cody: Should we go look for them?**

**Owen: Yeah. We probably should. Who knows where they could be on this island.**

**Heather: Well. I'll stay here in case they come back.**

**Rachel: So will I. Anyway, i still have homework I have to do. **

**Noah: You aren't even going to school right now, how do you have homework?**

**Rachel: Did I say homework? I meant.....uhm....I need to get tampons!**

**Guys: Woah. See ya. (they all leave to start the hunt for me and Geoff)**

**Gwen: Ok....well. come on girls. We better get going if we want to make it back before sundown.**

**The girls leave and rachel starts looking at heather who is in a pink polkadot bikini. **

**Rachel: Hiii. (giving a guilty grin)**

**Heather: What do you want?**

**Rachel: Ohhh nothing.....EXCEPT THIS. (tackles heather to the ground and starts slapping her) Y do you allways wear the same outfit every day?? CHANGE IT ONCE IN A WHILE. It's gross!!**

**Heather: Ow. Ow. Ow. MERCY.**

**Rachel: Now what r u gonna do?**

**Heather: Change more. Ok? ok. Please dont hurt me.**

**Rachel: That's better.**

**Back at the lake with Geoff and Me**

**Me: Niiice sim trunks.**

**Geoff: Thanks. (he is wearing blue hawaiian hibiscus pattern tommy bahama swim trunks) Nice bikini.**

**Me: Thanks. (I am wearing a white multi color polka-dot bikini.)**

**Geoff: So ready to do this?**

**Me: DO this? Ha Ha. soooo wrong.**

**Geoff: Omg. I remember when i was your age...I guess i should have phrased that differently.**

**Me: No no no. Im sorry. I have been hanging around my friend Jamie too much. **

**Geoff: So you can handle me saying do this and suck it and stuff like that?**

**Me: Yup. I am the mature one in my group of friends.**

**Geoff: Sweet. **

**Me: Yeah. Ok. so r U ready to start?**

**Geoff: Yeah. Come on. Get on this board.**

**Geoff pushes a yellow surfboard toward me and i get on it sitting like a pro with no problem.**

**Geoff: I thought you said you have never been on a surfboard before.**

**me: I haven't, but who says i never watched lilo and stitch?**

**geoff: Ha Ha. True. Ok. do ya know what to do now?**

**Me: I think. Ok. Watch out now, i may pull you under when i go.**

**Geoff: I think i can handle a 4'10" 14 year old pulling on me.**

**Me: Yeah yeah yeah. Don't be so sure of yourself.**

**I get on my knees on the board and start paddling out. A wave comes and instinctively i stand up and start surfing. I am doing great until. **

**Rand (my crush): BRIANNA. WHERE ARE YOU???**

**Me: Omigawd. **

**I fall into the water pulling geoff down with me. We pop up and he goes to ask what happened.**

**Me: Shhh. It's my crush. I don't know who called him or how he got here, but he is, and i don't want him to see me in this bikini. I look like a slut.**

**Geoff: No you don't you look....Perfect.**

**Me: Really?**

**Geoff: Yeah. You are absolutely beautiful.**

**I start gazing into his eyes and he gazes into my eyes. All of a sudden we both start leaning toward each other and we...**

* * *

Pompeo (my friends crush): What happens? Huh?

Me: Where are these guys coming from?

Rachel: Beats me.

V.V.: SHORTY.

Me: Shut up and go fuck your mom.

V.V.: Y r u so mean?

Rachel: Cause your a bitch. Now leave. (slaps v.v.)

Me: Thanks ray. Ok. Well. Review please.


	8. Uhm Wierd

****

Me: ok. im back. We introduced two new characters last chappy, rand and pompeo (pronounced Pom-pay-oh).

Kailee: What happens between you and Geoff?

Me: Wait. You'll see soon.

Anna: Wow. you are really fucked up if you are writing about Total Drama island.

Kailee: So true, but i still want to know.

Me: Ok. One. Anna shut the fuck up you know nothing about Total Drama Island and how awesome it is. And two. kailee, YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE TO WAIT.

Rachel: Yo.

Me: Finally someone who likes TDI.

Rachel: Yerp.

Me:...Okay....

Disclaimer: Don't own. Don't sue. Only my retarded ideas.

* * *

We leant closer and closer until we...

Me: I can't.

I pull away from his hug and push him away.

Geoff: Huh?

Me: I can't kiss you.

Geoff: Why not?

Me: Ok. Think about it. You have a baby, a wife, and you are 12 years older than me.

Geoff: So?

Me: Omigawd. You are not what you seem. Do I have to spell it out for you?

Geoff: Ok. I get that i have a daughter and a wife and that there is a huge difference between us, but that doesn't mean we can't do it just once.

Me: Oh. My. Gawd. I have to go. I better go make dinner.

Geoff: I thought you ordered taco bell.

Me: Nope. My FRIEND doesn't like taco bell so i told her i would cook.

Geoff: Come on. Order her thai or something then.

Me: No. I better go.

Rand: BRIANNA. WHERE ARE YOU??

Me: And I have to go see what he is doing here.

Pompeo: Rand, have you seen Brianna anywhere?

Me: And him too. I will see you later.

Geoff: But bri-

Me: No. I should never have come out here anyway. Good bye.

I walk out of the water and back to the mansion sneaking around behind pompeo and Rand. I open the door to my room to find my cousins Ashley and Brandon sitting there.

Me: OMIGAWD. Where do these people keep coming from?? I mean really..I thought this was a total drama island story not a bring all of brianna's family and friends here just to make her go crazy.

Brandon: Brianna, I am your father.

Me: OMG. You have not changed Brandon.

i embrace my 17 year old cousin in a hug and then look at my cousin Ashley.

Me: And what are you doing here cotton candy?

Ashley: I think you know Vanilla Cupcake.

Me: Come over here and give me a hug.

I embrace her in a hug.

Ashley: So. How's it going wet one?

Me: Loooong story. I'll tell you over dinner...OH SHIT.

Brandon: Did you just swear? Did she just swear?

Me: Yes i swore. I need to get dried off and go back to the mess hall to make dinner.

Brandon: I'll help. Where's the mess hall??

Me: Walk out the front door and go north until you come up to a small log cabin. My friend Rachel will probably be there waiting to be fed.

Ashley: Do you need me to do anything?

Me: Yeah. Go kill Geoff.

Ashley:.......Why?

Me: I told you. Loooong story.

Ashley: Ok.

Me: I will be right back.

I go into the bathroom and change into black gauchos and a "music is my life" hello kitty shirt along with black flip flops and a treble clef necklace.

Me: Okay. Let's go.

We all head for the mess hall to find Rachel beating up Heather.

Me: Ok. BREAK. IT. UP.

Rachel: Oh hey. SHE STARTED IT.

Me: Ok. Who are you and what have you done with Rachel?

Rachel: I AM A BEAUTIFUL PALM TREE.

Me: ... Uhm. Heather get up and go put on some clean clothes. And Rachel go find the other campers along with Rand and Pompeo.

Rachel: When did they get here?

Me: Last chappy.

Rachel: Ok. Hey. Who are they?

Me: Oh. Meet my cousins Brandon and Ashley.

Rachel: Yo.

Me: Ok. How does chinese food sound?

Rachel: Good with me. See ya.

Me: See ya.

I begin cooking dinner when Geoff walks in.

Me: Awww shiiiiit.

Geoff: Brianna? Where are you?

Me: I'm right here. (i am attempting not to kill him with the knife in my hand)

Geoff: I came to apologize.

me: For what?

Geoff: For being a perv. I stayed in the water for a while longer and realized i was wrong to hit on you. I AM married and I shouldn't be hitting on someone who is 12 years younger than me. I apologize.

Me: Apology accepted. But, why did you hit on me?

Geoff: Well, your different. You aren't afraid to express yourself. Most girls just wear jeans and a t-shirt, but you wear skirts and dresses and different stuff. And your really nice.

Me: Awwwww. But so is Bridette...even if she is amish. hey. Aren't you supposed to be amish too?

Geoff: Nah. She isn't amish. She just dresses like that cause she works at old sturbridge village.

Me: Ohhhhhhhhhhh. That makes sense.

Geoff: Yahhhh. But Duncan, he is amish.

Me: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Soo funny.

Geoff: Heck yea-

Rand: Brianna! There you are.

Me: Wow. Are you actually talking to me? we never said a word to eachother last year...

Rand: Yeah. I heard your in the play and a have a one line solo.

Me: Yup. Sooo amazing huh? Ha Ha

Rand: hey. It's cute.

Me: Ha Ha. Thanks, Rooster.

Rand: Oh dear. here it goes again.

Me: Ha. Sorry. I couldn't help it. Rachel and Paige judt watched the school play of Annie from last year and Paige complimented on your Sexy Hips.

Rand: Ohhhh. Ha Ha.

Me: So how's foote?

Rand: Eh.

Me: Ha HA

Pompeo: HIIIIIIIIIII

Me: Holy crud!

Pompeo: Wats up?

me: Nuthin...Ya know, this is really taking away from TDI.

Cale ( another dude i know): Hey Little buuuddy.

Me: Holy shit. Okay. I am gonna wrap this chappy up considering it is getting away from the point.

Everyone then runs in and squishes me in a 27 person group hug.

Me: Cant. Breathe.

Everyone let's go.

Leshawna: Yo. Sorry bout that baby doll.

Me: ...........Uhm..Who want's chinese?

All: WEEEE DOOOO.

Me: Ok. Dig in.

* * *

Me: Ok. wierdest chappy ever.........The next chappy will be better. I promise. Ha Ha. How about it is the next challenge? If you have any ideas for a challenge, tell me. THANKS. REVIEW.


	9. justin

****

Me: Heyyyyy. Next chappy is HERE. WOOT.

Rachel: Oh dear lord.

Paige: He shorty. Hey Rachel.

Me: hey.

Rachel: Sup?

Paige: Nuttin much my homies.

Me: Uhm.

Rachel: Uhm.

Paige: Uhm.

Disclaimer: Uhm

I elbow the disclaimer

Disclaimer: OW. Don't own. Don't sue. Only my retarded ideas.

* * *

Rand: Mmmmm. Who made this chinese?

Me: That would be me.

Pompeo: Wow.

Me: Heh Heh.

Rachel: So. When's the next challenge gonna be?

Me: I dunno. But shouldn't we get our new friends into mansions?

Chris: Yes. Yes we should. Rand and the wierd kids (wierd kids being cale and pompeo) can stay in the blue mansion. Ashley can stay in the red mansion. And Brandon can stay in the camper.

Brandon: Wait. What? Why do they get mansions and I get a camper?

Chris: You scare me.

Brandon: Oh I am gonna do a lot more than scare you. Reta-

I cover his mouth and glare at him.

Me: Remember what happened when you called your principal that?

Brandon: You had to remind me?

Me: yes. I love you, and I agree that the principall shouldn't had called you stupid but...You didn't have to call him a retard.

Brandon: Yeah yeah yeah. I would have done a lot more than call him that if he went any farther. I would have put him in a half nelson then a

Me: No. Chris, can Brandon stay in my mansion with us?

Chris: Sure.

Me: Thank you. Ok everyone. Let's all get back to our mansions and get some rest before the next competition.

Everyone goes home to their mansions and awaits the next competition.

The next morning. We are all at the stage and Chris is playing in a pool of pudding with a rubber duck.

Me: Ok. Welcome back everyone. I have good news, bad news, and more good news.

harold: What's the first good news?

Me: Ok. The first good news is that Bridgette and Geoff are happy parents with a new, healthy daughter named Miracle.

Everyone: Awwwwwwwwwwwww.

Lindsay: Whats the bad news?

Me: Bridgette will not be coming back to participate in the competitions anymore, although she will be coming back to cheer on her friends.

Lindsay: How is that bad news? Thats good news.

Me: Depends on your perspective.

I look at Geoff with a worried look.

geoff: What's the final good news?

Me: Your competition today is a scavenger hunt. There will be five teams. Two of the teams will have six players. The rest will only have five. I will give you the teams when I finish explaining the rules to you all. First off, you will all get a list of items to find. Some will be an easy find, others will be harder. Each team will get a digital camera to take pictures of the items because i do not want you to take anything from it's place. Once you find all of the items and have pictures of them all, you will come back and print the pictures on one of the five developer things over there. bring the pictures and your list to me and if you win, each member of your team will recieve a new laptop.

Rachel: SWEET.

Me: Are all the rules clear?

Everyone: Yes.

Me: Good. Ok. Team one will consist of Heather, Gwen, Cody, Trent, and Geoff. Team two will be Owen, Izzy, Duncan, Courtney, and brandon. Team three will consist of Rachel, Anna, kailee, Rand, and Pompeo. Team four will consist of Harold, Leshawna, Noah, Eva, and Ezekial. And Team five will consist of Katie, Sadie, Lindsay, Beth, DJ, and Tyler.

Justin: What about me?

All the girls swoon except me, rachel, kailee, and anna.

Me: You are too much of a distraction. You aren't in this one.

Justin: Ok. I'll tan.

Me: Ready, set, go! Your lists are taped on your shirts.

Kailee: What?

Me: Look on the back of your shirt.

Rachel looks on the back of Kailee's shirt and finds a list and a didgital camera.

Me: How did you not feel that? Ha Ha. Have fun.

The campers are off and start finding their items. Here is the list of items to find.

1.) Pinecone

2.) Pineapple

3.) tennis ball

4.) dog

5.) squirrel

6.) pencil

7.) stuffed animal

8.) coconut

9.) Chinese man

10.) lion

11.) sea shell

12.) rabbit

13.) cave

14.) bone

15.) girraffe

With Team Two

Courtney: How are we possibly supposed to find these? Half of these aren't even geographically correct.

Duncan: Calm down, princess. We'll find them.

Courtney: How?

Duncan: Doesn't Brianna have a dog?

Courtney: Well, yeah, but how is that supposed to help?

Ducnan: Well, don't dogs chew on bones?

Courtney: Oh yeah. COME ONE.

Brandon: Hey look. A SQUIRREL!

Owen: Quick. Take a picture!

They snap a picture of the squirrel and rush to find the rest of the objects.

With Team one:

Cody: How in the world are we going to find a girraffe?

Gwen: isn't that a girraffe on your shirt?

Cody: Oh yeah.

Trent: Say cheese!

Cody: YO DAWG.

Heather: Close enough. Come on. Let's go find more.

With team three:

Rachel: How easy is this?

They already found ten items.

Kailee: I know right? We are so gonna win.

With team four:

Ezekial: Yawn. So boring. So simple..How many items have we found so far? like 20?

Eva: Uhm, there are only 15 things on this list and we have none of them.

Ezekial: Well then what are you guys doing? Get a move on.

Noah: COME ON.

He grabs ezekial and drags him by the ear.

With team five

Katie: Aww look at the dog playing with the squirrel and the bunny. HEY. That's three of the items. Quick. Take a picture.

Sadie takes a picture and they continue on their way.

back at the stage.

Me: Wow. this is fun.

i am now in the pudding pool with chris. splashing him with vanilla pudding.

Chris: I know. Thats the great thing about being the host, you get whatever you want no matter hoe stupid.

Me: WOOT.

About an hour later teams one three and five rush back and begin developing their pictures. Ten minutes after they arrive, teams two and four begin their developement.

Team one: WE'RE DONE. Look at our pictures.

Me: Guys, these are all pictures of geoff's party in a cave. You're out.

geoff: Dang it dude.

Team three: We're done. All the pictures are perfect.]

Me: O. My. Gawd. These pictures are of rand shaking his sexy hips.

Rachel: Oops.

Team Five: We're done. Here ya go.

Me: Wow. these could not be more pathetic. these are all pictures of the ground.

Tyler: I tripped a lot.

Team two: Look at ours now.

Me: These are all of brandon posing and/or wrestling the guys.

Courtney: It was sexy.

team four: here ya go.

Me: let's hope they are actually good. O. My Gawd. You guys only have pictures of Noah and Ezekial making out. NO ONE DID THIS CHALLENGE RIGHT.

Justin: I DID. I did it on my own. There was a list and camera on my back so i went out in search of the items. Here ya go Brianna.

he hands me the pictures and i am amazed.

Me: You actually got all of the items..Along with pictures of yourself. You get the new laptop.

Justin: WOOHOO.

Guys: Dang it.

Girls: Ahhhhh. Soo hot.

Me: Oh geeze. This can't be good.

* * *

Me: You can know what can't be good next chappy. Can you believe Justin won?


	10. three is a magic number

****

Me: Heyyyyy. Next chappy is HERE. WOOT.

Kailee: Uhm....Woot?

Me: Yes. Woot.

Kailee: Whatever. I just wanna get out of here.

Anna: Me too. Can't you vote me off or something?

Me: Maybe..

Rachel: You may as well.

Paige: Yeah.

Me: Paige.

Paige: Yeah?

Me: LEAVE.

Paige: FINE Gawd.

Me: Ha Ha

Paige leaves.

Me: Well..here is the next chappy.

Disclaimer: Don't own Don't sue. Only my retarded ideas.

* * *

Chris: WELCOME BACK TO CAMP WAWANAKWA!!

Me: Today is the third challenge an THREE people will be going home.

Chris: And remember, if you don't recieve a marshmallow you will have to leave on the dock of-

Me: LOVE

Chris: Board the boat of-

Me: WINNERS

Chris: And you are never allowed to-

Me: NOT HAVE FUN AGAIN!!

Gwen: I thought it was dock of shame, boat of losers, and never allowed to return to the island again?

Me: Not anymore..it made people feel bad..so I i mean WE changed it.

Rand: Uhm. Ok. I like it.

Me: Thanks. Ok. So let's get started on todays challenge. Today's challenge is similar to a challenge from ten years ago. Today you must capture your assigned animal and bring it back on a leash. If you are the first one to successfully do this, you will recieve a $1,000 shopping spree at the new Camp wawanakwa MALL!!!

Everyone: WOOOOO.

Rachel: Is there a hot topic?

Me: Yes.

Anna: How about an FYE?

Me: Yes

Kailee: And a Barnes and Nobles?

Me: Yes. There is every store ever created in it. It is the biggest mall in the world with ten floors of pure magic.

Everyone: O.o OMG!! YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY

Me: Ok. You will find your assigned animal under your chair. Please take the sheet of paper and read your animal out loud when I call your name.

Everyone removes their animals name and leash from the chair and reads it.

Me: Kailee

Kailee: Squirrell

Me: Anna

Anna: Chipmunk

Me: Rachel

Rachel: Shark

Me: Pompeo

Pompeo: Bald Eagle

Me: Rand

Rand: Turtle

Me: Geoff

Geoff: Bear

Me: trent

Trent: Frog

Me: Harold

Harold: Snake

Me: Owen

Owen: Cardinal

Me: Justin

Justin: Can we skip reading our animals out loud?? It is gonna take up show time.

Me: Good point. Ok. Everyone, START

Everyone races out and goes in search of their animals. within five minutes each camper spots their animal, but doesn't have luck hooking the leash on them. After about half an hour Trent returns.

Me: Trent, how did you get the bald eagle so calm?

Trent: How else? I took a bald Eagle training class when I was in eighth grade. Doesn't everybody?

Me: Noooo. but you win the shopping spree!

Trent: SWEET.

Speaker: All campers please report back to the mess hall. trent has won and it is now dinner time. We will be having meatloaf, mashed potatoes, gravy, squash, and corn. And for desert, German Chocolate cake or Apple crisp.

Everyone arrives back at the mess hall and eats and then goes to the bonfire to vote off three contestants.

Me: Ok. The votes have been cast and we have our los- I mean winners of fun...Ok. The first marshmallow goes to trent. gwen. heather. harold. rachel. owen. justin. noah. pompeo. rand. tyler.

I call off the names of 23 campers.

me: i am sorry, Izzy, Kailee, and Anna. You have been voted off.

Izzy: Whatever. HA HA HA. SEE YA SUCKERS!!! Runs away from the group and into the woods......

Kailee: Uhm. YAYAYAYAYAYAY.

Anna: YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYYAY.

Me: Yaya?

Anna: Yeah. Kai and I wanted to be voted off, so we voted ourselves off..

Me: Thats...great. See ya.

* * *

Rachel: Finally. Less people to bug me.

Me: Ha Ha.

Rachel: What? I hate people.

Me: Yeah Yeah Yeah. I know I know

Rand: Well..See what three people get voted off next time. REVIEW.


	11. cook your way to the top

****

Me: Heyyyyy. Next chappy is HERE. WOOT.

Rachel: Whats it about this time?

Me: I dont know...

Rachel: You are writing a chappy and you don't know what it is even about?

Me: Yuppers.

Rachel: meh.

Pompeo: I WANT THE WINE OF MY COUNTRY.

Me and Rachel: The wine of your country is beer.

Rand: Obviously.

All: HA Ha HA.

You would get it if you were in the school play!!

Me: I GOT IT.

Rachel: Got what? A life?

Me: Nooooooooo.........An Idea....wait a minute.. HEYY. THATS NOT NICE.

Rachel: You just realized that?

Me: Yamate.

Disclaimer: Don't own. Don't Sue. Only her retarded ideas.

* * *

Me: Welcome back to Camp Wawanakwa. Today on Total Drama Island there will be a cooking contest! Each team will get an assignment and will have to present it to Me and Chef Hatchet Tonight.

Tyler: Wait..Why Chef Hatchet? Where's Chris?

Me: Oh..he went on a little vacation.......

The camera shows chris bound and gagged in his closet.

Chef and I exchange mischevous looks and continue.

Me: Ok. Today it is going to be a boys vs. girls challenge. You have all day to prepare your meal. Girls will be working in the new and improved mess hall kitchen and boys will be working in the kitchen in my mansion. Ok. Your assignments are on your stoves. Ready...COOOK.

The campers rush to their stations and begin cooking while chef and I go to windsurf and dive with the dolphins in my pool. Yes My pool in here is the size of a lake. it is AWESOME.

With the boys...

Pompeo: Ok. I will be the head chef because my parents own a restaraunt and my granpa owns a catering company.

Rand: Oh god...this oughtta be good.

Pompeo: What's that supposed to mean?

Rand: You won't let anyone else do anythign if you have anything to do with it. You take control when it comes to cooking.

Pompeo: Oh blah. You take control when it comes to music.

Rand: No I dont.

Pompeo: Yes you do.

Rand: No. I. Dont.

Pompeo: Yes. You. d-

Duncan: Can we get cooking? We have to make coconut shrimp, chicken Parmagian, crescents, and coconut cream pie in an hour. COME ON GUYS. Let's work together for once.

Trent: Yeah guys. Seriously. I want to win this challenge. I don't want to have any of you vote off. It IS a double vote off this week.

Pompeo: You're right trent. Sorry Rand.

Rand: It is ok. Sorry Pomps.

Geoff: Ok. Now let's get to cooking!

All guys: YEAH.

They all start cooking like crazy and have a blast.

With the girls...

Gwen: Ok. So we have to cook bbq meatballs, broccolli salad, BLT's, and chocolate pudding pie.

Rachel: I GOT THE PIE!!!

Lindsay: Ok... so she has the pie down. Now who is gonna do the others?

Beth: I got the broccolli salad.

Gwen: I have the bbq meatballs.

Heather: I have the BLT's.

Rest of the girls: Ok. Lets get cooking.

After the hour is up the teams have to present the food as well as they can.

Boys are up.

Geoff: (wearing a waiter's out fit) Welcome to camp wawanakwa. We have a three course meal prepared for you today. We hope you enjoy.

Geoff claps his hand and Rand and Pompeo come out holding the coconut shrimp and dancing to "Your Majesties" from rodger's and hammerstein's Cinderella.

They present the rest of their meal the same way and leave.

Girls are up.

Gwen: We have nothing special prepared, but we hope you enjoy it.

They bring out the meal and allow chef and I to savor it.

Me: Ok. Chef and I had a very difficult time deciding who won, but we did decide what team the prize would go to. Boys?

The boys start cheering.

Me: I apologize but you have not won. Congratulations girls.

The boys sit down upset as the girls dance around them.

Chef: We will see you at the campfire tonight.

That night....

Me: Tonight is a double vote off. We have tallied up the votes and it is my duty to tell you who has been voted off. Tonight on Total Drama Island, Rand and Pompeo are being voted off. I am sorry guys. But you two have to leave.

Rand: Eh. I have to get back to singing anyway.

Pompeo: And I have to work on my kingliness.

Me: Mmmmmhmmmm. Well. See you next time on TOTAL DRAMA ISLAND.

**Me: Sooo...sorry bout voting you two off...but my readers just dont seem to like the idea of having a bunch of my own friends on here.....sorry....**

* * *

**Pompeo: I dont care that much. I can work on the play more.**

**Me: Ha Ha HA. **

**Rachel: WAHHH.**

**Me: Whats wrong?**

**Rachel: Now that the play is OVER, so pompeo you dont have to work on the play anymore,**

**Pompeo: Oh yeah...**

**Rachel: But I am gonna miss my willarkins. Oh LILLYYYY.**

**Me: There there...mayb we should end this chappy before I start crying too.....*sniff* Well...see you *sniff* Next WAHHHHHH. I can't do it....**

**Rand: you next time. **


	12. from 20 to four

**Pompeo: Boyfriend**

**Me: SHUT UP!!!!**

**Rachel: (raises fist up to pompeo's face) don't make me.**

**Pompeo: Ha Ha. You know I was just kidding.**

**Me: Yeah Yeah.**

**Travis: GINGERASS!!!**

**Me: TRAVIS!! GET OUT OF MY STORY!!!**

**Rachel: (beats up Travis and throws him into a closet)**

**Me: I really need to start this chappy...**

**Rand: Need the disclaimer?**

**Me: Yes please.**

**Rand: DISCLAIMER!!!!**

**Me: Thankies.**

**Disclaimer: Dont own. dont sue. only my retarded messed up ideas.**

**

* * *

**

Me: Ok..I think the episode with me and chef running the show insted of me and chris worked out better. So, from now on me and chef will be runing TDI!!

Chef: Yups

Chris: WHAT??

Me: You heard us. You are FIRED.

Chris: I can't believe I was fired by a 14 year old 4' 11" blonde girl.

Chef: well..ya did. so LEAVE!!

Chris: Ok. Ok.

Me: Ha Ha. So, chef, any ideas for this episode?

Chef: No...OH. I got it. Lets spy on the campers and see what they do when we don't have them performing challenges!

Me: OK.

Chef: And then you and I will chose five people to be voted off.

Me: YES. That will make it go by faster and we will be able to remember everyone easier.

Chef: Yup.

Chris: Can I help?

Me: NO!!!!!!

Chef: May I?

Me: Of course.

Chef pulls out a chainsaw and chases chris around the island until he is forced onto the boat of losers and off to alaska. Ha Ha.

Me: Ok. Lets spy on Gwen and Trent first.

Chef: Ok.

Over with Gwen and Trent.

Trent: So, have you decided on a color scheme for our wedding yet? or at least a theme?

Gwen: Yeah. I was thinking our theme could be halloween.

Trent: YES. And we could dress up in halloween costumes.

Gwen: EXACTLY!! And our first dance could be to our song, Ballroom blitz.

Trent: YES!!!

Me: (whispering to chef) They better invite us.

chef: Mmmmhmmm

Trent: Did you hear something?

Gwen: Yeah...

Me: CHEF!

Gwen looks over towards the window. I quickly duck down.

Trent walks over and looks down.

Trent: BRIANNA!!! CHEF!! What are you two doing??? Spying on us??

Me: Yes...it was our episode today cause we couldn't think of a challenge. and then we are going to vote off five people on our own depending on who is most boring, disgusting, or odd.

Gwen: Could you vote off geoff?

Me: Why?

Trent: He keeps hitting on Gwen.

Me: OMG. He hit on me too!!

Gwen: And he hit on your and my friends! Including NOAH!

Me: EWWW!! But he is married to BRIDGETTE!!!

Gwen: I KNOW. Thats why he needs to leave.

Me: Ok. He is soo off. So. You are having a halloween wedding?

Trent: Yup. I guess you heard it all?

Me: Yeah. No surprise to me. So. What're you guys gonna dress up as?

Gwen: Well. I will dress up as a devil bride.

Trent: And I am going to be a zombie groom.

Me: Cool. Are your guests going to have to dress up?

Trent: Obviously. It woudln't be fun if they didn't.

Chef: Are we invited?

Me: CHEF!!!

Trent: Don't worry. You two are invited.

Me: YAY. Need help with anything?

Gwen: Well, actually, i still need help deciding who will be my bridesmaids, and my maid of honor, and my flower girl.

Trent: And I need help deciding who my best man, ring bearer, and such will be.

Me and chef exchange looks.

Me: We can help you guys.

Gwen: Oh thank you sooo much.

Trent: Thanks a ton chef.

Chef: No problem.

Me: Yeah. here. let's have the bonfire now and then we will help you guys out. you only have a week.

Gwen: Oh. Thank you thank you thank you.

Me: No prob.

Five minutes later at the bonfire (10:00 am)

Noah: So. who're you guys voting off? I heard you two were deciding today.

Me: We are. And we are voting off Geoff.

Geoff: Aww COME ON!!

Me: Noah

Noah: Ehhh.

Me: Eva

Eva: Meh.

Me: Rachel

Rachel: WHAT??

Me: and Tyler.

Tyler: Whatevs.

Chef: Wow. they are taken it pretty easy.

Tyler: well we know where we go after this so it isn't a huge deal.

Me: Where do you go?

Tyler: The spa.

Me: Oh. You mean the one that is now made up of three spas, five jaquzis, five pools, eight saunas, and all you can eat buffets?

Tyler: Are you serious?? THAT ROCKS!! Does it still have the bar in the middle of the pool?

Me: Yup. It is still the same, just much bigger.

Eva: WOOT!!

Me: Is there anyone who WANTS to be voted off??

Everyone except rachel, gwen, trent, and owen raise their hands...

Me: Ok...I gues that Rachel, trent, gwen, and owen are staying on the island while everyone else leaves on the dock of fun, to the boat of winners, over to the spa of ahhhhhh-mazement.

Chef: See ya!!

That night me, chef, rachel, gwen, trent, and owen start the plans for gwen and trent's wedding.

* * *

**Me: I think i am losing my touch with writing these stories...(sigh)**

**Rand: Ehh..i think it's fine. I it is kinda like a script.**

**me: I know. It is supposed to be.**

**Rand: Oh.**

**Pompeo: BOYFRIEND!!**

**Me: OMG. WILL YOU STOP!! TOM MAY BE MY BOYFRIEND BUT WHO CARES!! DID I DO THIS WHEN YOU WERE DATING MORGAN??**

**Pompeo shrinks into a little seedling thing..**

**Me: Ha ha.**

**Rachel can't stop laughing.**

**Me: Why are you laughing?**

**Rachel: Cause I remembered when we teased pomps about what he did to morgan when she was absent. remember?**

**Me: Ohhhh yeahh. "OMG YOU DID HER?? IS SHE OK??"**

**Rachel: "OMG. IS SHE PREGNANT WITH YOUR KID??" "DID YOU GIVE HER AN STD??"**

**Me: Ha HAl. Good times.. good times..**

**Pompeo: SHUT UP!!**

**Me: Nahhhh...**

**Rachel:: Im good... Ha Ha.**

**Rand, me and rachel are cracking up while pompeo continues shrinking to the size of a blueberry out of embarrassment.**

**Rand: Review please.**


	13. random fights and pizza

****

Me: HEY GUYS! Sorry it's been so long since my last post. I have been pre-ocupied with other things lately.

**Ryuu: EEEK YOUR BACK! *tackles me***

**Me: Yeah...i'm back, Ryuu. Uhm..i can't breath with you on top of me...**

**Ryuu: Heh heh. Sorry.**

**Sakura: Youre back?**

**Me: I'm Back. Are we gonna do a pow wow thing now?**

**Ongaku: Yup. Waht up shawtay?****Me: Did you just say shawtay? I thought I was business woman/tribal teacher**

**Ongaku: Ohhhh yeah...Oh well. Wheres the pomps?**

**Me: Oh yeah...whoops.**

**Pomepo: Someone mention my name?**

**Me: Heyyyy! Gonna kiss your one true love? Hee hee.**

**Pompeo: Shut up!That's gross!**

**Ongaku: What are you talking about?****Me: Oh yeah...you weren't there. At my summer party, pomps and anna were TOTALLY flirting.**

**Ryuu: WE WERE NOT! We were just hugging and kissing eachother on the cheek!**

**Me: Yeah, anna...that's not flirting at all..**

**Ryuu: IT"S HAYLEY!!!**

**Me: Ok ok. Hayley...whatever...can we get on with the story?**

**Ongaku: Can I kill chris?**

**Me: I...guess?**

**Ongaku: YAY!**

**Disclaimer: Don't own. Don't sue. Only my retarded ideas.**

* * *

Me: Hello and welcome to Total Drama Island!

Chef: Hey.

Gwen: What do you mean i'm a bridezilla?!

Me: Oh dear... Shall we go see what the problem is?

Chef shakes his head up and down.

Me: Ok.

We go over to the girl's cabin where rachel and owen are sitting on the bed and trent and gwen are arguing.

Me: What's going on?

Trent: NOTHING!

Me: Doesn't sound or look like nothing. Wedding troubles?

Trent: SHE IS A FRIGGIN BRIDEZILLA! WHERES THAT SHOW WHEN YOU NEED IT?

Gwen: HE ISNT PAYING ATTENTION TO ANY OF MY IDEAS!

Me: I thought you guys both agreed to have a halloween themed wedding.

Gwen: We did.

Me: And you picked out the cake right?

Trent: Yeah.

Me: And you sent out the invitations?

Gwen: Of course.

Me: And everyones coming?

Trent: Yeah.

Me: And you have your costumes?

Gwen: Duh.

Me: And you have agreed on all of the plans so far?

Both: Yes!

Gwen: Where are you getting at?

Me: How is he not paying attention to your ideas and how are you calling her a bridezilla when you two have finished the plans and agreed on all of them?

Trent and Gwen freeze and look at each other.

Owen: Now you guys gotta hug!

They hug.

Owen looks at rachel.

Owen: Can I have a hug?

Rachel: IZZY!

Izzy runs up and slaps owen.

Owen: Owwww....that hurt. Oh well! *owen goes into a closet with izzy and we hear....noises.*

Me: Ok....Anyone ready for the next challenge? Or do you just wanna order out for pizza?

All: Pizza!

me: Ok. Chef can I have your cell phone? I left mine in my room. *i take chef's cell and call pizza hut* AAAA PIZZA HUT A PIZZA HUT KENTUCKY FRIED CHICKEN AND A PIZZA HUT! *i started singing until they picked up* Oh hey. Sorry. Can I get one extra large pizza with pepperoni and cheese? Oh and bacon and sausage and meatballs. THANKS! Oh deliver that to wawanakwa island. See ya tommy!

Rachel: Tommy?

Me: I couldn't remember the guys name.

Owen: So you call him...Tommy?

Me: Yeah. Wait when did you leave the closet?

Owen: Two seconds ago.

Me: Okay....

Tommy: DELIVERY!!!

Me: Thanks. How much?

Tommy: Five cents!

Me: Ok. *i take a twenty from my pocket* Got change for a twenty?

Tommy: NOPE! *he grabs the twenty and runs*

Me: Darn. I was gonna buy us ice cream too...and i wanted a lolipop.

Owen: You can have mine.

I barf.

me: IM FOURTEEN! EWWWWWWW!

Owen: Yeah but youre sexy.

Me: IZZY!

Izzy comes and drags owen into the closet.

me: Ok. Lets all eat pizza. Then chef will buy everyone ice cream and we will go visit the other peeps at the spa thing!

WOOT WOOT WOOT!

* * *

**Ryuu: That was boring.**

**Pomps: No kidding. I didn't kiss anyone.**

**Me: You aren't in it anymore, pompsicle.**

**Pomps: You are mean.**

**Me: Ha ha. Go kiss rand.**

**Rand: I'm right here.**

**Me: Oh....whoops. I really hope none of my other friends other than ray reads this...or ppl i dont know...or i would be dead right now.**

**Sakura: BRIANNA! *comes up to me with a mace***

**me: Oh no...what?**

**Sakura: I just cleaned my mace. But i broke my glasses and lost my contacts. Can you tell me if it's clean enough?**

**Me: Yeah...it's clean..just get it away from me. **

**Sakura: OK! *she twirls around and the mace hits Heather in the head***

**Me: Heather? Are you ok?**

**Heather: Get off me bitch! **

**Me: It's teen heather back to be a bitch.**

**Heather: Where's lindsay! **

**Me: She is dating your boyfriend in tahiti.**

**Heather flies to tahiti. **

**Me: Ha ha ha ha ha!**

**Ongaku: I'm bored.**

**Me: Then go bug someone.**

**Ongaku: OK!**

**She starts txting me saying "########" and "&&&&&&" and stuff i hate. **

**Disclaimer: REVIEW!**


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